So frustrated by money (or lack threof)

And it's especially frustrating when you don't have any! It feels like we're robbing Peter to pay Paul right now, and for the past few weeks... I just pray that Mike's work picks up so that we'll be able to keep our bills paid... Right now, everything is behind. Everything. I've had a hard time admitting this to myself... and I feel like I am stripping myself bare right here for everyone to see. It's also forced me to talk to my husband about how much money we owe--and to whom. I know that everything happens for a reason, so maybe that's the reason.

I am just so frustrated, and I'm trying really hard to not let this get me down. I believe that the money will come just in time, and that it will be enough to keep us from financial ruin... it's just so hard to keep the faith when we're going through this kind of a trying time...

Mike's check comes by mail weekly. It should have been here today, and it was not in the mail. Mike had to call the office & ask for an advance on his pay so that we can fix the broken windshield in the Peterbilt. That kinda makes you swallow your pride. I have to pay our gas & electric bills by Monday, and all our major payments (house, both vehicles & Pete) are behind... I hate this feeling. I don't like to owe anyone money. I can only pray that we're able to recover quickly, and that we have learned from our mistakes. This time it was not our mistake that got us into trouble though... it's the fact that Mike's work has been so slow. He was off work 3 weeks in Dec/Jan, and he has only worked about 10 days since that... It just feels like there is no end in sight. It hurts, and I find myself really fighting depression once again.

I have so much to thank God for though... I have stored food in our pantry & freezer, so that we have plenty to eat. We have fire wood, so we will stay warm. I have bought "supplies" in advance (like soap, deodorant & toilet paper)... so I know we will be ok. We're not going to starve or freeze. That's a comfort, at least... and I thank God for giving me the foresight to plan for such times.

I don't mean to get anybody else down... I just needed to vent it out! If you've read it.... thanks for "listening".